I had the day off today. It was so lovely yesterday, Sunday, to know that I’d have today off. No stress about finishing the laundry or getting ready for Monday morning. I enjoyed Sunday all the way until the end.
I didn’t even have to think the thought. It was just there, like the sun behind the clouds. Except there was no sun. An unexpected day off means a visit with Mom. And my blissful evening turned dark and sad. It’s so easy to forget the things I can’t bear to know.
That’s how the days go now. play play play cry play play play cry. Lots of playing until I fall and scratch my knee and she isn’t there to put on the bandaid. I can put on my own bandaid, but sometimes I just don’t want to.
A half century does not mean I’m a grown-up. It just means I’m a really old motherless child.