1. Numbers: Shelah-Lekah

God has a hissy fit.  The Israelites have lost faith, yet again, in themselves, in God, in Israel.  And God is pissed.  Moses convinces God not to kill all of the Israelites (and he creates a remarkably good argument…it’s worth reading).  At first, this seemed like the sum total of the parsha, so I went online to see what others think.  There’s always so much more to Torah than I can read on my own.  I need to spend more time at Torah study…this does truly need to be turned over and over.

There’s an awful lot to chew on.  “First do, then believe”.  There’s a saying I use with my kids:  “fake it till you make it”.  It’s an AA saying I think.  As much as we think we know everything, we don’t.  Whether you believe in God or don’t, sometimes faith is required just to get through the day.  Faith and preparation.

I’m dealing with this daily right now.  It was scary to quit my job, especially in this impossible economy.  But the job wasn’t working with my life, so here I am.  My faith in myself told me I could make this work.  But faith alone won’t get it done.  Doing the preparation: making phone calls, marketing myself like mad, sending emails daily, looking for excuses to connect with people in my business.  Faith is great, but if I just sat around having faith that a job would fall into my lap, most likely no job would ever fall into my lap.  I have to do the work, prepare.  Do and then believe.  The two together make up faith, but doing has to come first.

The Israelite spies looked at the big picture and freaked out.  They were paralyzed and couldn’t “do”, so they lost faith.  When I look around, I see this everywhere.  Sometimes the job is too big, but paralysis is never the answer.  Baby steps are the answer.  Do and then believe.  That is faith.

That’s why God wants us to wear tzitzit I think.  It’s a reminder to do.

1. Numbers: Be-Ha’alotekha

Be-Ha’alotekha means “when you step up”.  The Israelites are on the move, and God, as a cloud, is leading them.  This portion happens during the second passover, so apparently it occurs in early spring.  That’s a good time, if there is one, to be traveling in the desert looking for food.  And the Israelites subsist on grain (manna).  As a matter of fact, in this portion there is complaining about the lack of meat.  But I jump ahead here.

So the Israelites subsist on grain, which requires water to grow.  It makes sense to stay with the clouds as they will provide the rain to grow the grain.  And if you live in the desert, whether it’s Sinai or Paran, water is important.  According to what I’ve read, Paran is south of Mt. Sinai, which means they are walking away from Israel.  Kind of interesting, but that would account for the 40 years of wandering.  If  they had walked straight from Sinai to Israel, I think the trek would take less than 2 weeks.  But then, they didn’t have google earth.  They were following  clouds.  And there were more than 600,000 of them who were not always eager followers.  And that number reflects only the men I believe.  If so, you could probably triple it.  1.8 million hungry, grumpy people.  So God told Moses to gather 70 people to share the burden of the followers.

In one of the articles I read about this portion, there is talk about the Jews being God’s firstborn, the chosen ones.  The first born is held up as the most spiritual, the one who is to follow God.

The whole idea of “chosen one” has always bothered me.  I am a first born.  I am a Jew.  I am no better, nor am I more spiritually available, than anyone else.  But this article I read makes an interesting point.  God is only God because of the first born Jews, the Jews of Moses’ time.  I am only a mother because I gave birth to Emily, my first born.  God is only God because the first Jews believed this to be true.  If not for the first born Jews, there would be no God.  God’s existence relies on the Jews, and by extension God’s existence relies on the belief of each individual.  So, really, everyone is a first born.  Everyone is chosen, if they choose to believe.  Because God only exists as we choose to believe God exists.  And, in my opinion, there are no 2 beliefs in God that are the same.  So, while many of us believe in one God, we do not all have the same God.

When you look up at the clouds, what do you see?  And if you describe what you see to your sister, brother, mother, father or friend, how can you be sure that they are seeing, really, the same thing as you are describing?  Thank God for clouds.  Thank clouds for God.

1. Numbers: Naso

Naso means to lift up.  There’s a lot of counting, dealing with a woman who may or may not have been unfaithful (no discussion about men in the same position….oh wait, men couldn’t be unfaithful because they could have as many women as they wanted….damn), consecrating the tabernacle, who was carrying what, and the priestly blessing.

I love it when the rabbi blesses me.  It feels amazing.

“The Lord bless you and protect you! The Lord deal kindly and graciously with you! The Lord bestow His favor upon you and grant you peace!”

But I’m not good at giving blessings.  Not comfortable.  At Em’s bat mitzvah I gave her a blessing.  It took me a few weeks to write, then I could barely speak it.  Maybe that’s why I have trouble giving blessings.  The priestly blessing is pre-written.  The emotion is between the recipient and God, not the rabbi.  When I give a blessing it is my emotion alone.  At the synagogue on Friday nights I cry when I sing the prayers.  I’m okay until I try to emit sound, and then I cry.  Same with blessings I guess.  It doesn’t bother me to cry at tv commercials, it doesn’t bother me (too much) to cry in synagogue, but somehow saying a blessing to someone I love scares me.  I don’t know why.  I’m apparently not afraid to cry.  I wonder what I’m afraid to feel.

1. Hello Numbers: B’Midbar

B’midbar translates variously as” in the desert” or “in the wilderness”.  The desert metaphor works well if you see the Torah as water, a parallel that I’ve read several times.  The Israelites are tasked with taking a census, and the rules for encampment are spelled out very specifically.  This parshah comes the week before Shavuot, the holiday that celebrates the receiving of the Torah.

We all live in wilderness, but some don’t see that.  My daughter has a note up on her facebook that’s pretty revelatory.  I don’t recall the exact wording, but I think her meaning goes something like this:

people who think they need psychological help don’t need it as much as the people who don’t (think they need psychological help)

People who think they have it all figured out, socieities who think they have all of the answers, talk show hosts who believe that what they believe is truth (they’d give it a capital “T”), religious leaders who tell you who and what God is; these are the people who don’t realize that they are in the wilderness.

When I quit my job recently, I entered a new and different kind of wilderness.  There is no one telling me what to do every minute of my day.  There is no right answer.  There is no clear direction, except for the one that I choose to take.  It’s really thrilling and kind of scary.  What if I take the wrong path?  What if I miss a connection?  Who will correct me, help me, show me…

The essay I’m working on about interfaith relationships is showing me the same thing.  In my interfaith family, we are in a wilderness as well.  There is no one to tell us how to be our interfaith family.  There are people who can tell us how to be an interfaith family the way that they are, but they can’t tell us how to do it our way.  When I look around at other families, occasionally I’m a little envious.  They seem to have it all figured out.  We know another interfaith family that seems to do it differently than we do.  The dad, who is not Jewish, always wears a kippah in synagogue.  My husband does not.  I know that struggles that we face, but I don’t see theirs.  I just see the dad wear a kippah and presume that they have it figured out better.

They don’t.  As I’ve gotten to know them better, I realize that they struggle as well, much more than we do.  I like my wilderness better.  My friends who are married and are both Jewish struggle in ways that my husband and I do not.  Their wilderness is their own.

We all live in the wilderness, in the desert.  Each of us needs to find our own answers.  The Torah might provide some of those answers, if you choose to look there.  I enjoy looking to the Torah for answers.  The answers are all puzzles, they are not clear and concise, they are not specific.  Sometimes they don’t seem to make sense, and maybe sometimes the search itself is the answer.

1. Leviticus: Emor

a few details….emor means “speak”.  This portion explains the obligations of the priests (who they can marry, what dead people they can be in contact with, somehow these two items don’t seem to go together to me).  And we get a rundown of all of the holidays (passover, yom kippur, sukkot).  There is no mention of hanukkah or 8 days of presents.  Duh.  Then we hear about how a blasphemer should be killed.  Lovely.  A blasphemer is someone who speaks God’s name as a curse apparently.  And anyone who hears him has to put their hand on his head then the blasphemer must be stoned by the communitiy.  Kinda strict, dontcha think?  But then, I guess when you are trying to create a new community and set up some rules and guidelines, maybe it’s appropriate to go a little over the top.  Otherwise, just like children, the newly formed community will push the limits.  It seems to be human nature.

So I read a commentary on this parsha and it struck a chord:

In Leviticus 22:32 we read: “You shall not profane My holy name, that I may be sanctified in the midst of the Israelite people—I Adonai who sanctify you.”

 Translation issues become important here. The text says v’nikdashti, “and I will be made holy” amidst the Children of Israel. Or, in other words, “You will make Me holy just as I, Adonai, have made you holy.” 

 This is what I wrote on the notcards I created for my 50th birthday:  “Each friend represents a world in us.  A world possibly not born until they arrive.  And it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”  by Anais Nin

So it is up to each of us to create this meeting and experience this relationship, this world.  We have a choice to have a relationship with God based on whether or not we make the leap to meet God, or whatever our version of God is.  Once the meeting is made, the world exists for us to then either inhabit or not.

This, to me, is much better than being told who or what God is.  Because honestly, you don’t know.  And neither did Moses know my God.  Nor do I know yours.  And I guess this is why Jews don’t really seem to define God….something that I think many people of other faiths do not understand.  God is not given, God is chosen.  By us.  Or not.

1. Leviticus: Aharei Mot and K’doshim

There’s a lot of burning this week.  As I read Torah, I find myself trying to interpret things by today’s standards and understanding.  I think sometimes it works for me, and sometimes not so much.

Aharei Mot:  after the death (this portion comes after the death of Aaron’s sons who displeased God and were killed)

Kedoshim:  holy ones

This week I see the beginning of Yom Kippur, yearly atonement for sins.  I like the part where Aaron presses the sins of Israel onto the head of a goat then sets the goat free in the desert.   Maybe I can find a neighbor cat to use in the same way…perhaps the one that thinks my vegetable garden is her litter box.  I’ll call her the scapecat.  There’s talk about slaughtering animals and bringing them to the Tent of Meeting to be sacrificed–I wonder if this is the beginning of animal slaughter requiring blessing as part of kashrut.  And we can’t eat fat (that must be burned for God).  We can’t eat blood–maybe because that is part of the sacrifice–but I don’t think so.  It’s spelled out pretty specifically several times that we are not to eat blood or we will be cut off from the community.  Yuk.  Blood sounds kind of gross as a meal anyway.  According to the portion, the soul of the animal lives in its blood.  Interesting thought.

Then the portion goes on and on about who can have sex with whom.  Actually whose nakedness one can uncover.  And because of the way this is written, it applies to the men of the community.  In two different places, and I think two different voices, the portion says that (first) a man cannot lie with a man as he would a woman because it is an abomination and he will be cut off from his people.  Then (second) it says that a man who lies with a man as he would a woman will be put to death.  As will a child who curses his mother or father.  As will an adulterer.

But we don’t kill any of these people.  And often we don’t punish them (I’m thinking in terms of the adulterers and the smart alecky kids).  Times have changed.  Once upon a time reproduction was what allowed the Jews to survive in a world that lived differently.  Reproduction and the teaching of Jewish ideals grew Judaism and allowed it to survive.  That’s not what keeps Judaism alive anymore.  What allows Judaism, or any religion, to survive (except possibly the Catholics who don’t seem to evolve very quickly) and prosper is changing with the times.  We don’t have to have babies to survive.  We have to be a relevant religion to survive.  Relevant to the times, welcoming of the times.  Once upon a time animal sacrifice was required.  That is no longer relevant.  Persecuting homosexuality is no longer relevant any more than is persecuting couples who choose to remain childless.

That’s how I understand this, in today’s terms at least.  Fundamentally speaking (and I am making a specific comment on “fundamentalism”), this portion teaches us to treat the stranger as ourselves.  That is an ideal for all times.  Don’t judge me unless you’ve walked a mile in my shoes.

1. Leviticus: Tazria and Metsora

Tazria means “she conceives”. Metsora means “one being diseased”. There’s a lot of talk of cleanliness and uncleanliness. Leprosy, or whatever skin disease they’re actually referring to. Cleanliness of bodies, of houses. And a lot of sacrificing to become clean after being unclean.

The thing that I find kind of funny is that I often hear outrage about how women are determined to be unclean while they are menstruating. I guess it is kind of outrageous. But now that I’ve actually read this part of Torah, I’m less outraged. Because men are considered unclean when they ejaculate. I wonder what is meant by “unclean”. But, whatever is meant, both men and women are seen as unclean in similar circumstances, considering the differences between our bodies.

I find it more disturbing that women are unclean twice as long after giving birth to a girl over a boy. Does this smack of misogyny? Or whatever its opposite is? Either way, there is not equal billing for both boys and girls. I find it disconcerting that either gender was preferred over the other. This is at the root of the “battle of the sexes”.

We spent some time with family friends recently. Both of the parents are attorneys and they made multiple references to one of them winning over the other. Actually, it was the wife that made the references. It made me kinda sad.

The last thing that I want in my marriage is to feel like Steve and I are not on the same side. Even when we disagree, we are still on the same side. Clean or unclean, we seem to be in synch there as well.

1. Leviticus: Sh’mini

Keeping kosher.  Eating with intention.  Living with intention.

We had to build a kosher bubble the other day.  I’d been doing so well, and reading Sh’mini was such good re-inspiration for keeping kosher for Passover.  Then we went to lunch and I ordered a fried fish sandwich without even thinking about it.  No intention whatsoever.  When it arrived I looked at it and realized that there was nothing on the plate that I could eat.  So we decided we needed a Passover bubble to get me through this one meal.  Probably not approved by the rabbinate, but 3 children and 2 adults were able to maintain intention even as I screwed up my original intention.

People wonder what the point of kashrut is.  I never have a good answer.  I don’t keep a kosher home, but I do appreciate the ideal of kashrut.  Intention is too often non-existent in our world.  I bought Michael Pollan’s Food Rules recently.  Maybe eating to save the body and the planet is easier for some people to digest than eating kosher for the sake of living with intention. 

My son taught me about living with intention (and made me really proud of myself as a parent).  He has been saving for a DSi for a few months.  He decided yesterday that he is not going to buy a DSi.  He is going to buy a book about sewing.  He thinks it will be more fun.  He’s 11!!!!! 

We talk often about life and creativity and the effect of our actions on us and others.  When he plays computer games for a long period of time he gets grumpy.  So I mention this when I see it.  Most of the time it seems to go in one ear and out the other.  But I gently continue to notice.  And encourage all of the creative activities that he loves.  My intent is to channel his thinking to the creative rather than the passive.  Little by little, intention is rewarded.

He no longer wants to bring video games along when we go somewhere.  When he does play video games they more often involve building or creating, rather than search and destroy.  And yesterday was the crowning glory.  He thinks a DSi is boring compared to sewing.

So my advice….live with intention, raise children with intention, eat with intention, love with intention.  Rewards are often the intention itself, but sometimes the reward is even more tangible.

1. Leviticus: Tsav

More directions, but these are for Aaron and his progeny and their ordination and so forth.  Directions and rules.  What to do, but not why to do it.  Other than because we are commanded.

I follow some of the commandments.  Not all of them.  Recently a woman told me that west coast Judaism is watered down, not real like east coast Judaism.  She said that the Judaism she finds out here is not spiritual.  It is too focused on tikkun olam and politics.

It’s passover.  One of the commandments that I follow is to refrain from eating leaven during passover.  I started many years ago.  Long before I had my children.  Before I ever joined a synagogue.  My daughter, who is a Jew to her core, eats leaven during passover.  She says that not eating leaven does not make her more or less a Jew.  Her diet doesn’t bring her closer to her beliefs or distance her from them.  She says that she is not a slave and not eating bread does not connect her with the slaves of our history.  None of her Jewish friends are eating bread this week.

It feels good to me to not eat leaven during passover.  Jews all over the world are not eating leaven.  Maybe the connection I feel is to those Jews.  The Jews who are doing the same as me at the same time that I am doing it.  We are doing something for no reason other than because we are supposed to do it.  There is no obvious purpose.  There is no obvious result or expected outcome.  It’s easy to do things that have an obvious purpose.  We drive on the right side of the road because if we drove wherever we wanted, we’d all end up in accidents.  So to stay safe we have rules that we follow.  But following a commandment that does not lead to an obvious result is not as easy and (for me) creates a connection to everyone else who is following the same commandment.

And it feels good.  That is good for my spirit.  It is spiritual.  I am spiritual.  I am a west coast Jew.  We are spiritual….if that is what we choose.

1. Leviticus: Va’Yikra

Off topic for a minute….

I spoke on the phone today with a man whose son and grandson from Israel need a place to spend Passover.  I offered our table to the son and grandson as well as the father/grandfather.  He said that he would probably not want to come as he is an atheist.  He was very sweet, but I did not get the connection between his belief in God and spending the evening with us.  He said maybe he’d decide to join us.  I hope he does.

Or two…

Bezalel Design would be a great company name for me.  Bezalel was the son of Uri son of Hur of the tribe of Judah.  He built the first tabernacle.  “see, the Lord has singled out by name Bezalel….He has endowed him with a divine spirit of skill, ability, and knowledge in every kind of craft and has inspired him to make designs for work in gold, silver, and copper, to cut stones for setting and to carve wood—to work in every kind of designers craft—and to give directions”.  Don’t you think?  But if I choose a company name then I need a business account to cash checks and I’m sure there will be some kind of financial penalty for not using my own name.  So it’s on the back burner right now.  But it’s a great name.

Now seriously, on to Va’Yikra.  It’s all about offerings.  There are a few types of offerings:  just plain old offerings (like maybe when you need something of God?), there’s a peace offering, an offering when you’ve done something wrong, an offering when you don’t speak up, when you touch an unclean thing or “human uncleanness” (I’m a bit afraid to imagine the meaning here….my 11 year old boy could undoubtedly come up with countless examples), when you utter an oath, when you commit a trespass, when you sin by breaking a commandment about things NOT to be done, when you act deceitfully or defraud another or lie.  There is lots of burning, spraying about of blood, and delivery of various types of animals and unleavened bread to priests, as well as restitution in the case of stealing or lying to another.  It’s all very specific instruction given through Moses to the people.  And I’m afraid I find some of it a little suspect.

When I was in college a friend and I started a ski club.  We made people pay dues and we organized cabins that they could use in Tahoe.  We spent their dues paying for the cabins and for caretakers.  And luckily we were quite honest.  We wrote our own club bylaws.  In the bylaws we wrote that because we were club founders, we had lifetime rights to membership and could use the cabins at member rates forever.  We could write whatever we wanted into our bylaws.  We could have said that the God of snow had told us that we should be able to ski for free forever.  Once the bylaws are written down, they become a sort of code to live by.  Like the Constitution.  I guess that’s why college students don’t write things like bibles and constitutions.  They cannot be trusted to see the greater good.

Moses brought God’s word to the people.  Many of the offerings include extras for the priests (Moses’ brother Aaron and his progeny).  And I suppose since the priests were the lawmakers of the day, they might have been too busy settling squabbles to go out and earn a living.  So maybe the extras (bread, grain, animals) were necessary sustenance for the priests.  Maybe it’s not so suspect after all.  Perhaps if Moses had come down and said that God said that people had to give over all of their wealth to him and his family, then that would have been suspect.

So I take back all of my suspicion.  Whether God said it, or Moses said it, it was certainly said by someone with the wisdom to make good choices, not by a college student looking out for herself above all.

1. Exodus: Va-Yakhel/Pekudei

Interesting how this portion begins with Moses explaining that God says that every Israelite must observe the sabbath by not working and not kindling a fire.  And further, if any Israelite does work on the sabbath they will be put to death.  Pretty serious offense.  Really serious consequence.

Then, in the next paragraph, Moses begins a list of all of the very specific items that God wants brought by the Israelites to contribute to the building of the tabernacle.  He calls these items gifts.  And they should only be brought by those whose hearts are moved to do so.  The Israelites are commanded to bring gifts, but only if they want to.  Kind of a contradiction of sorts.

So that gets me thinking.  There have been so many rules laid out in the last few chapters.  Very specific rules, many of which must be followed under penalty of death.  Then God wants a bunch of gifts, and there is no consequence to not fulfilling this request.

We make lots of rules as parents.  Lots of rules that our kids must follow.  My kids have to do homework before they do other things.  They have to eat at the table.  They aren’t allowed to lie.  Often I make them come with me to the synagogue, even when they don’t want to.  Maybe that’s wrong.  Maybe God was making a distinction between the kinds of rules that must be followed, so that society works, and recommendations that benefit us more as individuals.  I’m not sure.  There’s a definite distinction here, and it’s not yet clear to me.

Is God wanting the Israelites to dwell with him only if that is where there heart brings them?  I did not grow up in a religious home.  I came to religion by choice and it fulfills me.  Maybe if it had been forced on me, I would not embrace it the way I do.  Maybe it’s time to let my children make their own choice about participating.  Although I will make my youngest continue with religious school through his bar mitzvah.  At that point, he can make a choice about how he wants to continue.  But maybe, outside of school, it should be up to him.  Maybe that’s what God is saying.

The end of exodus

Wouldn’t you know the week I missed is the first DOUBLE parsha week. Oh man. But don’t worry. I now have time to do the things that I love. I’ll be reading all kinds of Torah tomorrow and catching up. I’m catching up on a lot of things right now. So sleep well and check in tomorrow. I’ll finish up Exodus and take a peek at the beginning of Leviticus. Kinda excited to begin a new book.

1. Exodus: Ki Tissa

wow…big week.  And yes, I know I’m late again.  It’s been a big few weeks in a lot of ways.  I’ve made a major life decision.  I’m leaving my job and going to work for myself.  It’s a crazy time to be doing this, what with our insane economy and the extreme lack of work in architecture, but it’s the right time just the same.

It was an even bigger week in Moses world.  He got to meet God and chat.  He even got to talk God out of killing all of the Israelites because of the golden calf.  That’s huge…Moses, the little human guy, was heard by God, the big god guy.  Being heard by the big guy is huge in anyone’s world.

So I was reading one of the ever so many Jew-mails that I get.  I have to copy and paste a bit here.  I read it while I was waiting for my lunch at the cafe that I usually go to near my office (my nearly ex-office).  I was reading it on my phone and got so excited I was tempted to show it to someone, anyone, even though there was no one that I knew in the place.  Really crazy….stuff happens the way it’s supposed to happen if you live with intention.  So here’s a bit of what Rabbi Naftali Reich has to say on this week’s portion:

In our own lives, it is important to recognize the enormous power we hold in our own hands. We are capable of attaining any goals we pursue with true single-minded perseverance, but sometimes we would do well to stop and consider where we are going. Only if we channel our energies correctly and pursue goals of enduring value can we truly enrich our lives and find true happiness and fulfillment.

So, in the spirit of choosing the right path, I am choosing to : 

  1. leave my job but not my career
  2. spend more time doing the work that fulfills me but doesn’t drain me
  3. volunteer to help the organizations that I am well equipped to help without emptying myself
  4. be available to my children and my family without feeling someone else is being cheated
  5. be happy to be where I am

So go check your map and make sure you’re on the path you want to be on, mean to be on.

1. Exodus: Tetsavyeh

The faster I go, the behinder I get.  My dad used to say that.  It seems to fit my pattern right now, but it will change.  I know that I can tell you my little not-so-secret.  I am leaving my job.  I’m sad, nervous, relieved, sad.  I know I said sad twice.  But I do love my job and all of the people that I work with.  So I’ll be sad to leave them, but they need me and a half.  And all I have to give is me.  So it’s time to step away and find a way to do what I love to do in the amount of time that I have to do it.  I’m sad, yes, but also excited to set out on a new adventure.  And I’ll have to dress properly.

Not a very graceful segue, but it’s late and I’m behind (er).  Tetsavyeh is all about fashion.  Appropriate fashion.  Aaron and his progeny’s priestly fashion to be exact.  And God was extremely exact about how the priests should dress.  Colors, materials, how they were used and what they stood for are all covered here.

Fashion is a gift and a curse.  In our society so many are slaves to the fashion gods (you know, the beautiful people in all of those advertisements).  I once had a plan to take the label out of every piece of clothing I owned and put them all on a single shirt.  That would be my “label”.  When my kids were young I told them that I wouldn’t buy them clothes with the name of the manufacturer brazenly displayed (unless of course the company wanted to pay me to use my children as billboards).  That is the cursed aspect of fashion.

But there’s another side to fashion.  As a society we set up visual rules and customs that help us to organize.  Every society does this.  Remember when Nixon flashed his two finger peace sign (in China perhaps?) and deeply offended the locals?  They didn’t read his two finger gesture as a compliment….I think it had a similar meaning to our middle finger gesture.  Well our clothes carry messages as well.  When I walk into a business meeting, I don’t wear jeans and a t-shirt.  I wear clothing that tells the people in the room that I have style and taste.  I’m an interior designer for heaven’s sake!  My visual presence is part of my story.  It’s not ALL of my story, but it definitely carries a message.

How many times have you connected someone that you did not know well with what they looked like?  “Remember that guy who had the funny tie and that yellow shirt?”  We hired a sculptor once to work on a hotel project that we were involved in.  He showed up at the meeting in pants that exposed much too much of his nether region, a t-shirt that was a few sizes too small, and an odor that was memorable.  When discussing him later, he was always described as the slob.

We cast judgment before we have a chance to know people.  It’s not a terrible thing, so long as we remain open to our judgment being wrong.  But you save a whole step by dressing in synch with the message you wish to send.  So it seems right that God made a big deal about the fashion associated with the people who were representing him.  If someone were representing me, I’d have an opinion on the subject as well.

1. Exodus: T’rumah

Gifts.  That’s what t’rumah means.  God tells Moses to tell the Israelites to bring gifts, specific gifts, but only if they are moved to do so.  Then God gives very specific instructions for building the tabernacle with these gifts.  Being in the business that I am, one day I will build a model of this tabernacle.  It’s just too tempting to not do it.  My son explained that a cubit is the distance from your elbow to your fingertips.  So I’ll scale a cubit down to maybe an inch or so and see if I can lay out this tabernacle.  Maybe I’ll just draw it in CAD.  That would be fabulous.  Then I can model it in 3D and add all of the colors and textures God requires.  One day, when I have a lot of free time.

The thing that struck me in reading this parsha is the portability of so many of the pieces described.  Plus the whole thing is a tent which is pretty portable in itself.  I think this is significant.  I know that everything is significant in the Torah, but I think this is especially significant.  I think God wants us to be able to carry our beliefs with us easily and always.  I think God wants us to carry Him with us.  I don’t think that God wants us to go to Him.  He wants to come to us.  He wants us to have a place to receive Him.

When I look at some churches I see magnificence, hugeness, greatness beyond man.  I see a place that one goes to experience the holy.  Or to try to find the holy.  But what I feel is small and insignificant.  Certainly not worthy of a meeting with God.  I don’t see God.  I don’t feel God when I am in a place bigger and more fancy that the greatest palace. 

I feel God in small quiet places.  I see God in the faces of my children, in the loving look in my husband’s eyes.  I feel God when my Jewish community comes together to take care of one another.  The tabernacle that God describes is filled with precious metals and stones, but it does not seem magnificent.  It is not bigger than a neighborhhood.  It is based on the length between a man’s elbow and his fingertip.  It is human scale…a place for us to receive God.

I seem to remember Howard Roark building his “temple to the human spirit” on a scale smaller than the churches of the day and being condemned for doing so.  Maybe it’s time to re-read that book….